117 - A God, Caring

Lin

Something came up today that resulted in me having to consider how I take care of my body food wise.

It turns out that most of the ready meals I have left have gone rancid.

So until next Wednesday, I'm going to have to find some cheap alternatives and/or takeout to feed myself with until the matter can be sorted.

This situation is actually kind of stressful, but is also my fault, given that I didn't make a point of storing those meals properly before eating them.

Naturally, there is a lesson in this.

The main one being that I need to ensure that I do what I can to conserve that which needs conserving for the sake of my future health.

I cannot and will not repeat the awful process I went through last night of having to painfully sit on the toilet, as well as in bed, whilst my body processed food that had very obviously gone bad.

The smell likely wasn't pleasant for my housemates, either.

Really, I should have taken the vinegary taste to mean that a lot of those meals were probably inedible.

Luckily, I now know for next time what to watch out for.

I told my caseworker, though it doesn't seem like they've replied, so it looks like I'm on my own until tomorrow.

But they're on leave next week, which means that I'll have to go to my doctor's appointment with the other caseworker for the house, which isn't a bad thing, actually.

Even so, I am still a bit anxious.

I can't tell if it's just about food, or if there's something bigger behind it. My neighbour playing music isn't helping, though I won't complain about it.

Putting on my fan heater seems to have helped somewhat.

Keeping my room warm almost always helps with my anxiety.

It sounds as though my neighbour's music is now off, or at least at a respectable volume, so I'm a bit better now.

The edge has been taken off a bit.

On a more positive note, my mattress was delivered today.

I asked to not be given the box frame that goes with it, but they insisted that I have it anyway. I told my caseworker, so it should be gotten rid of sometime between now and the week after next.

The mattress is better, and more comfortable, than sleeping on the floor, or on a bed that I could possibly break, so I feel much better about it.

Plus it's much less of a pain to move, when it comes down to it.

All in all, today has been a good day.

I even got to try a festival bun from Ole & Steen that I've been eyeing, and 10/10 would recommend.

Somehow, I was reminded of my childhood, and getting one with my Maman.

I think we were actually in Denmark at the time, but I would only have been little, so I know I wouldn't have been able to eat the whole thing - festival buns are huge, even for adults. Me and my Maman split it between us (messily), if I remember rightly.

I decided to research the name of the area that I was given, and it seems like it's not a coincidence.

The place name has the full first name of my alias in it.

It's also situated in a specific part of Denmark that I know to be ancestral land that some members of my family hail from.

Definitely not a coincidence.

Definitely not.

Oh, hej Freyja.

Surprising, but welcome.

Ja, I meant to announce myself but at this point, I don't think I need to.

I grin.

What brings you here?

Helping you.

I can't help but smile. Freyja knows my position better than most, besides my family, including my husband, as she has helped me multiple times when I've been in dire need of said help, especially with regards to mental and spiritual illness.

Yup. You're seriously physically isolated, dude. You need more people - at least, more healthy people, anyway. And more social interaction.

She's right. I'm by definition clinically starved.

Is there anything I can do?

She shakes her head.

I think you already struggle with doing things as it is, so let's get you people who can help take some of the stress off of you with regards to that. You already have your caseworkers, and two neighbours that care about you. I suppose you need more physical friends that actually know, understand and seek you out, right?

People who are community oriented, ja.

She nods.

I figured. I'll make sure they're easy to find, ok? I'll add other stuff in too. None of us want you to be lonely, so don't forget that it's now safe for you to call on the Norse pantheon too, ja?

Ja. Dankë.

She brightens, and outstretches to hug me. I reciprocate, and we both end up giggling.

I mean it, thank you.

She ruffles my hair, before releasing me from our hug.

Of course. You've helped me a great deal, too, as well as Skaði. And you deserve to have friendships and love in your life.

I appreciate you saying that. Are you going to go?

Not yet. I should be here at least until you're partially better.

Thank you again.

Of course. Are you going to rest now?

Probably not yet. I need to eat.

Fair enough. I'll be around if you need me, ok?

Ok.