158 - A God, Existing

Lin

I spent most of today sleeping.

Honestly, I wish I could have stayed that way.

Though at one point, I did dream of the voldys basically clamping a hand over my mouth when I tried to sing part of one of my songs.

Drop The Cross will probably anger a lot of people, but I'll stand in my conviction.

No matter which way you put it, I refuse to be silenced, especially not by them.

After everything I've been through, I have the right to expose those who have made a point of hurting me.

Part of me thinks that the silencing may actually relate to my birth name, and not the one that the voldys gave me.

Really, I refer to the nickname rickmansworth has for me, which makes me wonder why they had to silence me at that particular portion of the verse.

I've been trying to find myself on missing persons sites, but honestly, I'm not sure I will.

My whole kidnapping may have been covered up too well. I'll have to check for kidnappings in more detail.

Whatever happens, I want to make sure that I do what's best for me.

Given the situation I'm presented with right now, I should probably first figure out what I do have control over, whether that be with regards to the kidnappings, or to do with self care, which is my top priority.

I can help if you want.

Oh, Για, Hebe.

If you don't already know, Hebe is my cousin, and the Greek Goddess of youth, who is one of Hera's two daughters.

Well, I can look at both the self care and kidnapping parts, and we can go from there.

I nod.

There's a kid from Albania who looks suspiciously like me.

She nods.

I'll have a look at that. Anything else?

I nod.

I need more personal space, and I need someone to sort that out for me if I can't do that myself.

I can see what's available. Your personal space has been invaded a lot, right?

Ναι.

She nods.

I know you've probably already considered it, but you could put in a petition to Women's Aid to get you a fridge. And if not, then you can ask elsewhere.

I think it's also important to look at mental health stuff for you, because the council here are kinda shit, and you need better than CBT and basically being told to 'stop being a crybaby'.

Bunch of assholes if I ever saw any.

She's right. The council here aren't exactly brilliant. I won't even begin with my mental health practitioner. I've vented about her on here enough times for a lifetime. Though she did send me an email that proved she was talking through her arse and not listening to a word I was saying, so there's that.

I'm definitely getting the fridge. I'm sick of waiting for permission to have my own personal space. As for mental health things, I'm going to speak to my caseworker about that before they leave.

I also need to read for a few things.

Hebe nods.

Tarot readings always help.

She passes me a cup of taro boba.

You'll probably want some sugar whilst we go through this.

Ευχαριστώ. Now, where do we start?

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