176 - A God, Seabound

Lin

I spent most of today sleeping.

Whilst I definitely wasn't tired, I probably needed the rest.

Spiritually, I just found out that I inherited a disease outside of rickmansworth's control, which is fun.

The NHS website says that it is usually only inherited in Mediterranean, Middle Eastern, South Asian and East Asian families, which could potentially prove that the voldys are not my parents.

Despite knowing that most people would argue that it likely would have been caught when I was born, I disagree.

Firstly, it would depend on what type I inherited. Secondly, it would depend on the severity of my condition. Thirdly, if the voldys replaced another child with me like I think they did, the records that state what my situation was health wise would literally be rendered null and void because simply, they aren't my records.

Also, I've had several dreams over the past few days about being with the voldys again, and one specific dream in which a friend of mine basically saves me.

Essentially, she played nice and insisted upon us both walking to our destination, as opposed to us both getting back into their car, which probably did save me.

Having dreams about my abusers and insects hasn't exactly been pleasant.

But at least I know that someone was willing to do their best to get me out of there.

Styx walks by and smiles, trudging along with one of the pails full of water for her journey back to the Underworld. 

Ευχαριστώ, for letting me stay so long.

I nod.

Παρακαλώ. You're always welcome here, whenever you need.

Send my regards to Achlys when you see her.

She grins.

I will!

She waits as I heave the nemeton's rock door open, and plods over to Nyx's chariot. From said chariot, Nyx waves.

Safe travels, both of you!

They both nod, and gesture to the pail. I can't hear them, but I assume they're insisting that they'll return it.

Are you saying you'll give it back?

They both nod, and I laugh.

Ενταξει. Τα λέμε!

Τα λέμε!

Nyx whips out her cloak as they ascend, disappearing into the impenetrable night. Arthur and Merlin stand at my side, and I sense Herne behind me as we stand, marvelling at how astutely Nyx does her job.

I wish I could be as capable.

Herne places his hand on my shoulder.

I think it would be unfair to compare yourself to Nyx or Styx. After all, you have billions of years of trauma, curses, and a hereditary disease that altogether make doing your job extremely difficult.

The fact that you're even taking on this much responsibility is, in and of itself, a marvel to behold. Don't forget that you too, are amazing. Especially when you tell others, and give them credit.

The moss from his touch gathers around on my left shoulder, forget-me-nots sprouting from the green carpet now resting on my arm. As he lets go, I turn, and feel the moss slowly begin to shrink, but the message and love behind it still stands.

Thank you.

Merlin and Arthur have both turned back towards the nemeton as well.

We should go back inside.

They all nod, and I pause, letting them go in, before I hop in myself, rolling the door shut behind me.

They all take seats in the cinema room, and I note that Arthur and Merlin have begun asking Herne questions.

So how exactly did you get here? And what domain do you rule over?

Herne smiles placidly.

I was a Brythonic deity, but I ended up settling in the South East, which is why most people consider my name and legend to be younger than they are.

Some consider me to be the ghost of a vengeful gamekeeper, but as you can see, I am very much relaxed, and at one with nature.

I am, first and foremost, a God of nature, and plenty. And all those who stay at my hearth will always eat well. That is my main goal for now, besides following Lin.

Arthur nods, leaning forward in his seat as Merlin asks his question.

Speaking of them...

Arthur waves me over and I emerge from the kitchen, serving them all and myself with apple lemonade.

How exactly did you get to meeting Lin in the first place?

Myself and Herne exchange looks, and I attempt,  unsuccessfully, not to choke on my drink.

Would you like to explain it, Lin, or shall I?

I hesitate. There's a significant amount about how we first came to be in each other's presence and service, most of it being unrecovered memories. For once, despite being a time God, I would daresay that Herne would remember better than I.

I'd prefer if you explain it.

Alright.

Both Arthur and Merlin lean in curiously.

I was originally a part of Taranis' service, after he was first properly inaugurated off Sim. As well as being his cousin, albeit a distant one.

Merlin stares at him in shock.

You were of Taranis' household when he was given his lordship?

Herne nods.

I was the equivalent of his valet, but I rose through the ranks.

When Lin was born, I was assigned to be their personal knight.

He sighs.

But during rickmansworth's reign, that got scuppered, and my name was sullied by a blackguard pretender.

Arthur seethes.

So Lin's first point of defense was taken away.

Herne nods.

Whilst Lin is more than capable of defending themself, I was there to facilitate both their self care and safety, among other things like teaching them leadership and how to manage their estate and powers as the heir to the family line, but that tutelage was interrupted and sabotaged.

Arthur shakes his head, sipping on his apple lemonade.

I'd love to put rickmansworth's head on a spike.

For a moment, everyone is silent.

You and me both, Arthur. I'm certain there's more than just us who'd love to kick his arse.

Merlin nods.

Everyone here at some point has mentioned wanting to get rid of rickmansworth. I'm sure the other Knights Of The Round Table, as well as Robin and his men, would absolutely agree to be in on it if you asked.

I grin.

Marion is a part of my bloodline, so I would think they'd take the opportunity were it offered to them.

Arthur casts me a questioning look.

You and Robin Hood are related as well?

Direct ancestor and descendant through the version of me that is Rhiannon. Marion, that is. Robin's descended from Herne.

Ahhhh.

Herne nods. 

He's like a son to me.

Arthur smiles.

That fits well with the way he acts, too. A little bit wayward, like me, but he's placid about it - and I think he gets that from you.

I feel the sudden realisation of camaraderie in the room, and smile as for yet another moment, there is quiet.

Also, the apple lemonade is wonderful, Lin. Who taught you?

I beam.

Adephagia was tutoring me the other day on how to use ingredients to help heal people.

The apples were to represent Avalon, and home for us, as well as friendship and love in general. Then the lemons were meant to represent cleansing, and our roots in the Mediterranean as Gauls and Greeks.

The cinnamon and allspice is for luck, friendship and wealth, and the honey is for familial love and camaraderie, as well as mass healing.

Arthur grins.

She really taught you a lot in one sitting, didn't she?

I nod.

I'm grateful that she did. It felt like I was included, like she knew I had the latent capability, but wanted me to discover and make those kinds of things for myself when I was ready, as opposed to lecturing me about how I couldn't or wouldn't do it properly and therefore would never amount to anything, like the voldys did.

You can hear a pin drop. Herne quietly pats my back, and Merlin does his best to calm Arthur down before he absolutely rages.

Are you sure you don't want me to kill them?

Robin strolls in, holding a glass of apple lemonade, and casually takes a seat alongside Arthur, which stuns him into sitting back.

Because believe me, it would be a pleasure on both mine and Will's parts. Not to mention, Marion can feel your pain, and it's not pleasant. Not that that was ever your fault, because it isn't. People often ignore the effects of abuse on ancestral lines these days, and spiritual abuse runs rampant.

He takes a sip of his drink and swallows hard.

It's disgusting.

Arthur nods.

We'd all love to. But it's up to Lin. And from what I've seen, they probably wouldn't want us to spiritually damage ourselves doing it.

Robin nods firmly.

There are ways, though. I learned that justice gives you the perfect excuse. However, I want this to be at Lin's discretion, as those monsters abused Lin the most.

I nod along, taking in their responses, knowing that it all comes from a place of love, and do my utmost not to reveal my eyes watering. I fail miserably, and without fanfare, Robin offers me the tissue box, which I take gratefully.

There will be a time and place in which we will facilitate revenge spiritually on people. One person's comeuppance is already being dealt with, for which Herne has already done his part.

Herne nods in agreement.

For which it was my pleasure.

I continue.

I will involve all of you, especially Marion, with the other ones. I know each of you has likely met rickmansworth, and at least been affected by the voldys in some way or another, especially yourself and Marion, Robin. 

I want to be a God that delivers justice in the best way possible for all of those involved, without it getting any messier than it ought to be, in a way in which everyone gets to play a part, and feel helpful. I know that both yourself and Arthur will especially understand my need to facilitate this.

They both nod, and Arthur approaches me with a question.

That's all well and good, but isn't it unjust to sit on your own feelings to accommodate for others with regards to something this big?

I understand where you're coming from, Arthur. But what rickmansworth and the voldys have done goes far beyond me. It's the same thing with bin boy, with moronica, with the bully platoon. They've all hurt more than just me, and so will be dealt with according to their crimes against all those they've hurt, and not just me.

I have to be sea bound, Arthur, which means being unforgiving in a natural way, whilst allowing life to thrive in my waters fairly. To discount others would be a discourtesy to my duty, and to those I know who have done everything for me to not only facilitate my revenge, but to also aid me in my self care and accessing aid when I haven't been able to care for myself.

Arthur nods.

You really are selfless, Lin. It's a good trait to have. And I admire it. I ought to think more like you.

Though I will say this: if the time comes around and you need to feel your feelings as you conduct your revenge, don't suppress those feelings on account of everybody else. Alright?

I nod.

Alright.